“Our supercolony has expanded to 24 miles said the largest Lepisiota canescens, named Ralph. “We are the now the greatest Lepisiota ant colony on earth.”
“We can go further east,” said the queen. I know we can.”
“Problem,” said Ralph . “Sand Puppies.”
“Explain, said the queen.
“Better known as naked mole-rats,” said Ralph. “They have set out a large colony within our eastern quadrant.. I’m not sure how they got in, but they are here in our domain. They impeded progress.”
“Criminals and drug dealers,” said the queen.
“We stop them on the paths as much as possible,” said Ralph. “We shot some, but now they’re complaining about discrimination.”
“They have hairs between their toes,” said the queen. Expel them and their followers. That is the best way to deal with bad creatures. Ground dwelling immigrant scum!”
“But we live underground, and we came from somewhere else,” said a worker ant positioned off to the side.
“Are you suggesting we have something in common?” said the queen.
“Well, yes, “said the worker ant. “Like everything! We both do all we can to survive, propagate, thrive. We can both contribute. And we can test for that. Use science.”
“Lock her up,” said the ant. “She’ll spread fake news. Too much testing going on as it is. We don’t need science. We just need me. I’ve never read a book through but I know everything. I am the smartest ant that ever lived. Take her away. Ship out the trouble makers. Make the super colony great again!”
“Hooray!” shouted the ants as they carried the worker off to prison.”